EX. REPLAY OR EX. GAMEOVER

yeah so these past couple of weeks i've been thinking about a moment's folly that i did... not that i regretted it or anything but it still was stupid of me to do so without recce-ing anything beforehand... prolly it was the wrong timing... anticipated the H hour or what la...hahaha all army lingo here... so im kinda torn apart whether i should try my luck again and re-do the mission or should i just let this mission fail which has been planned for quite some time... so should i try my luck, how long do i have to wait till its the right H hr again? and if i just let this one pass, its like totally not worth it given the time and effort put in... yeah so such a complicated matter could only be one thing right? something to do with matters of the heart... ahahaha the power of deduction... yeah so by not giving a clear cut answer and lots of mixed signals so much so that my mind starts to play mind games on me again... which sucks totally... not sure if i'm doing the right thing at this moment too... just waiting it out to re-do the mission but this time im not sure how to execute it again... then again comes the qn of when is the H hr... i dunno... i guess i'll wait it out awhile longer... perhaps i'm just delaying the ominent heartache... besides that, whats gonna happen after that? friendship gonna just shatter just cos of a qn? it would have crumbled if not for me taking the pains just to keep it intact after the first mission failure... not sure if i can maintain the next blow too... haiz... matters of the heart was never an easy task to overcome... OCS motto: to lead to excel to overcome... cant even overcome this how to be officer sia... hahaha haiz... but seriously... i think i'll just play by ear lo... and even if the outcome isn't a happy ending, i'll still try to salvage whatever i can and not to make history repeat itself...